The Mirror Moon Newspaper and circling helicopters

Today in the news bull sights red in appliances section.

Giant glass of wine with a face drawn on it is named Mayor of Encyclopedia.

and Fierce Cat sues bus company.

*

Also in the news lighthouse man drops brick on canoe.
"Why did you do it?"
"Why does anyone do the things that they do?"

Entire Farm shut down due to the smell attracting helicopters.

and young celebrity popstar Mildred Threwsh was fired before she became a young celebrity popstar.

*

I'm just reading an article in 'The Mirror Moon' and wondering why they even bother selling this rubbish. Listen to this.
"Apparently there has been signs of forced entry in the giant marshmellow."
How could anyone even believe that? Apart from the obvious image evidence they have on the page.
I'm going to write and complain.

"Subject: Complaint
Dear Mirror Moon writer/s.

I am just a casual reader, i do not work for another newspaper. I was just wondering why you have such terrible writers.
Just a tiny tip, fire whoever writes the articles in the section of the paper that has writing in it. You are a horrible newspaper and i hope my complaints will cause you to close down.

PS: Give me back my customers

- The Daily Crumb '

There we go.
Posted it in the old E-mail box now all i have to do is waa.. i'm just wondering. Did i put 'The Daily Crumb' at the end?... no surely not, i'm not that stupid.
Hey! I'll tell you something else that happened today! This bug was climbing up the glass window so i let him in and now he's running across my office floor. You see, here at the Daily Crumb the exciting only gets more exciting when the fish arent dancing, and they rarely do, so thats positive.
Ooo *REPLY*

"Subject: AutoMirror_Info
Dear valued Customer
I am sorry to say we get over 1 million emails a day. It may come as a surprise to you but this email has been sent 'automatically'. Meaning, no human has had any influence in it's sending.
If your questions are not answered here or here please wait a few days for your email to be answered."

Well if i had the time id go down there, knock on the door and beat the living day-lights out of the skum that work there.
But i'm a bit busy at the moment.

"Subject: RE: AutoMirror_Info

OK i'll wait. "


- The Daily Crumb