Tuesday, June 03, 2008

They see the light, The story of Sennheiser and his love

Today in the news imagine if making an animation was like baking a cake. Your work looks delightful when it is finished. But soon a knife slices through it, and every chunk of it is swallowed and transformed into toilet food. Instead of taking one photo of the cake you'd want to take a thousand photos of every frame.... before it was eaten away.
Also in the news:
Sennheiser called me fourth to check out an old mine close to the new studio. I walked over and took a look. It was a giant hole, a few cm in it was pitch black. So i avoided it and went off to write this.

Hold on.
Yes that was a call from a certain Matthew Menhenick (Creator of RMN COPZ ). He says he is going to have to give filming Silver Screen 3 a 'miss'. Got a bit of 'work' do to a 'home' and down 'town'.
Thats fine. Thats aaabsolutely fine. Well, not really.
Wait, thats my walky talky going. Hello, Sennheiser?
"Yes, boss i seem to have come to a halt."
Well ask him what his name is.
"No, i mean i am stuck, i have my leg twisted under an underground pole. To be honest sir i am not feeling the full thrill you said id get jumping down an old mine shaft. The wooden ceiling is cracking above my head."
Aww thats a shame. Could you stop interrupting my writing session. These people want a Daily article you know.
"The 3 people that read this?"
"Sorry sir, my eyes slipped out of their sockets and fell into the lap of viewing figures."
Well dont do it again. For that you deserve to get crushed by that wooden ceiling.
"NO SIR! I'll do anything. Please, i have a family."
Yes, a family that kicked you out of their house remember. They said if you didnt leave they'd cut your legs off.
"It was my arms actually sir..."
Oh i found an old dancing santa decoration.
"Sir please..."
It's singing jingle bells and dancing!
"Sir the wood is leaning!"
.. and look! an old lasanga packet from last year.
Oooh alright, just because you're the only staff i've got.....
"thankyou sir!"
... i'll play you your favourite record. Choose a song.
"But sir, AGHHH it felaal. .. ..."
Oasis, dont go away. What do you say to that?
"urh.. sir.. i think i just lost a leg."
Dont go awwaaaay!
"The one above my head is creaking sir!"
Why call me sir? Theres nothing formal about being stuck in a mine now is there Sennheiser?
"Sorry sir.... call my wife.. tell her i love her."
You have a wife? You didnt mention her in your amazingly long and confusing story about your life two posts back.
"Yes.... i left her a while back."
why on earth?
"Well i had to move on sir, she was holding me back."
well.. i am sorry to hear that. What was her name?
"Halt. Her name was Halt. She was a few metres back in the mine. I miss her already. But she was really keeping me back i needed to move on... and then i got my leg stuck.. it was horrible sir."


You know what, i am going to let you die... just because you said that. I mean, you were married to a female nothingness?
"No sir, she wasnt nothing, she really was something."
Oh be quiet. Hold on i am coming to you....
"THANKYOU SIR! i will be eternally greatful."
... with a box of fireworks i am going to fire down the hole.
"oh... you must not! You will kill Halt and myself!"
Thats what i plan to do.

So i made my way over to the entrance of the mine and a young women crawled out. "you must save my husband. He is trapped in there!"
sorry, are you halt?
"What.. no i am Amanda."
Amanda?? Then whos your husband?
"My sweet Sennheiser."
I thought Halt was his wife?!?!?
"WHAT? He said that? The cheating little... are those fireworks?"
..uhr.. yes... why?
"Fire them down the hole, kill the both of them!"
OK! yay!

- Reported by Nathan Viney
- The Daily Crumb

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