GABBER HEARTBREAK

Today in the news phantom lunchbox aquires air mask. The paperwork says "Land at point 3 on map, coloured spot. Green arrow, green dots our men. Alert over mountains, Phantom Lunchbox in darkness. Body guard Simon the Hedgehog. Guns at the ready.
Red side, red dots. We turn these to red splatters. Parachutes: Organised by Toaster. Toaster remains to blame if all fails in the air department.
Officials signed paper work with red stamp and Biro Bill. Biro Bill has upgraded to charge of Phantoms. Though he must not interfere with their work. Only guide.

Also in the news
Sam Smith, the animator behind Plummet and director of the Zombie Train Station music video has released another short animation.
It is the first in hopefully a long run of cartoons starring the character, Nigel.

I am also the voice of the shop keeper.

Sammy is here once again with more of the weeks news

"Hey everyone. I'm just sat here listening to music. I have put my novel to rest for a little while. I'm eating gravy droppings on hot chips. There is no better meal in the winter time. The window is just a fog at the moment.
I have of course been keeping up to date with the important news of the world.
Through various news websites.

I basically searched
THE NEWS into google and got the all important, Portsmouth news.

Though Portsmouth news was full of death death drugs, gunshots, bodies in rivers. It was not a pretty site, or sight even.
That is the news today."
Sammy the Monkey, Daily Crumb Studios, Penny Lane."

*

Come on Sammy, is that ALL?
"Yes."
What am i paying you for??
"To take breaks in between my busy schedule to write some freaking sentance of news each week."
Yes. I also gave you that nice office, don't you forget that.
"The novel will be worth it."
How do you know that?
"I just do."
Next week give us some REAL news. ok?
"Right, whatever. Now stop talking to me on skype, i am busy."
Urrhg

*

Thankyou for reading.
It never occured to me that reading The Daily Crumb would be a chore. Now i realise it is and i apologise for this.
For that reason the Daily Crumb Team are taking 2 weeks off. (This was after some complaints we recieved from the ABC)
Once again the complaints were saying our writer, The Medium (Who is currently on holiday to recharge) was an offense to real mediums and spiritual people.
These spiritual communities need to learn that Nathaniel Tinga, Professional Medium is actually mentally insane.

- The Daily Crumb