Monday, September 08, 2008

Mrs. Crumpet Introduces you to her shop.

Today in the news everyone involved in yesterdays little incident have had their minds wiped.

Also, Mrs. Crumpet, the woman that owns the kingdom bakery would like to say hello and welcome.
"Good mornings my locks and key cars. This is my warm, cosy bakery. Over here is the corner of the shop, there is nothing here at the moment but i am sure something will grow over time. If you follow me to the centre you will walk into two or three tables, so i advise against it. You see, i am a spirit. I died a baker and could not leave my shop, so i still work here even now.
This corner has a mini bookshelf and sofa set, this is where i read to the pixies of the kingdom. (People say they're not fead literature by their parents). The children get plastic knifes and forks. This is because there was an incident a few weeks ago where a evil little cow pixie stabbed a metal knife into the heart of a baker here. It was me!
The regulars say i point out the obvious a lot of the time and i am a little repetitive. This may be due to my age of course.
This is the counter in which i stand and write down the orders. Mr Kennedy is the first to dingle through in the morning asking for a good dash of lemonander fredge and a light scoop of terryice paste to fill. He also buys a newspaper from me, The Daily Crumb obviously. I do not sell any other such crud fools.
Mrs. Vegetarian comes in next, dont be fooled by her title of course. She orders a large slab of human flesh with a coca-cola on the side. Nice woman, good to our workers.
They are the regulars. I was asked not to tell you this but Princess Artistic sometimes comes in here with Benjamin Biscuitboy. (It aint no rumour sunshine) Seen it with me only grime eyes. They eat the pasta experimenta' together. Very romantic you see, although Benjamin continued to make biscuits whilst she speaks to him. Never stops that boy, he worked here once, didnt last, got stuck in our oven.
Oh, gosh. That is what you're here for isnt it? It is rumoured Mrs. Crumpet's oven is the largest oven in the kingdom! I am so sorry for dragging you on with all this babble."

No... we just wanted to sidetrack readers from yesterdays..... thing.

"Oh right... well ill tel you one thing my deary. This morning we had fuff up Queen get ya head out of those clouds an' hoolahoop come in."

Queen get your head out of the clouds. Really? How did that go down?

"In those words, very well. She fell down a hole into the dungeon. They are electing a new Queen right now!"


- The Daily Crumb


  1. Does this bakery do Iced Doughnuts?
    Perhaps the spirit will bake me some?

  2. fatsack5:03 AM

    awesome :)