Today in the news the small man was counted.
In less important news as you may already know today is the end of the world.
I have collected a helmet and a beach chair. I will hold on tightly as the planet is sucked into it's own black hole.
Mr. Marsens is on the line, "We have tried to hold them back up until now but time has run out. They are going to go ahead with it.
It dosent matter in the long run, we will not have any memories of it. But incase we do zap into a different dimension please shower and dress formal.
The most likely possibility is that a black hole will appear and a little blue man with jump out. That is right, a smurf.
This smurf (as already organised) will give us the cure for cancer and maggot rash. (Maggot rash has not yet happened but we'll be ready)
It is in the hands of the minds of the scientists."
That was Mr. Brevron Marsens. We have sent reporter, 'me' up to the labs. (We really need to hire some more people.... Although i suppose it does not matter if this is the end of the world.)
I am standing next to the switch. It is about to be pulled. The man is grinning, a golden tooth in his smile.
"What are we to do professor?"
"I dont know, what do you want to do?"
"No, i mean about the problems."
"What problems? i dont even know what this thing is called. You deal with it."
"All calculations say the chance of sucking the planet into its own black hole are getting higher."
"That is good technology you have there, keep up the good work."
"Just watch will you! I will let you dine on flaming oil when you are in hell. You can be my right hand man."
"Yes that is right! I AM SATAN! And this my friends, is the end of Earth itself."
"No you cant! This is Satans work!"
"It is over... and the human race have not accomplished anything."
"Damn it! Where is my end of the world?"
"Be quiet Satan."
Last sighted: Somewhere in Geneva.
We know it wont happen but why do people care? They wont be there to moan about anyway :D