Sunday, February 24, 2008

Samurai Man, Space Dragon: the musical

Today in the news

Beans beans
they make you smoke
the more you eat
the more you choke

Samurai man
on his way
hopping along
to save the day

grease monster
he loves chips
but sauce man comes
and grease man dips

Pie man comes
eating meat
little bit of ale
on his feet


Dribbling ghoul
Wet grass
dribbles on you
Get a flask

Fat bat
cant fly
his fangs
you die

Space dragon
swoops around
Satellite falls
hits the ground

Mr Figg
step outside
A train Mr Figg
We're all gonna die

Mr Figg
step outside
A plane Mr. Figg
We're all gonna die

Old woman
Mrs. Monk
Got in the pool
She just sunk

What a fool
Painted bull
All those fumes
Melts my shoe

Meteorite
Turn and spin
Space dragon
dosent do anything

Boar in bed
Vomit in bowl
Rotten head
A broken soul

Italian man
makes nice pasta
Bought a van
serves it faster

Italian man
makes nice pizza
lost his touch
went to master

Master was gone
Seagull dead
Man went home
put it in bread

Germ creature
leaks around
Morbid creature
Kills the ground

Skin peals off
as it roam
flesh so soft
a bit like foam

Master stabbed a cat
with a sandal
he then sat
lit a candle

Italian man on Figg's foot
"I keep dieing"
"And i cant cook."
"Well listen here you nasty three."
"You're so small you are a flee"

Samurai man
enters the room
Doors swing open
loud boom.

"I have one leg, this is why i hop."
"Oh shut up, you just stop."
"Master please help us."
"AND YOU STOP MAKING A FUSS"

Mr Figg
step outside
A space dragon
We're all gonna die

"A wounded wing on a space machine"
"Human built?"
"Why are you helping him?"
King Kong enters with an ice cream
Pie man attacks
Is this all just a dream?

Dribbling ghoul and Fat bat
All sat
Oh drat, killed the cat
"You leave now you killed my cat!"
"But master we only just sat."

Germ creature bites some beans
begins to smoke, dancing to folk
continues to choke until

Walls cave in, roof falls down
Water crashing through
Fat bat drowns

Samurai crushed
by a big rock
Germ creature suffocated
by a sock.

Master dies a heroes death
head chopped off, his final breath

Dragon crushed
by brick and stone
Italian man collapsed
just like Rome

Mr Figg rides on the painted bull
Old woman dead you know
Boar in bed
Boar is dead

Bull dies
Figg crys
Aeroplane is landing
Figgs the last one standing


"Aww Figgs so sweet i want to marry him for breakfast."

- The daily Crumb

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